Hi, My Name Is Pete, and I Am a Workaholic

Hi, my name is Pete, and I am a workaholic. There, I have said it.

I began working at ten in my parents’ vehicle workshop, Costas Motors. At fourteen, I worked for Robert “Bob” Ilsley at Dolphin Coins in Hampstead. By seventeen, I was working full time under Christopher J. Adams of Wray Smith & Co Solicitors as an outdoor clerk. I eventually became a senior commercial litigator.

What began as parental expectation became something more complicated.

At different times, work was driven by ambition, fear of returning to poverty, the desire for security, the need to hide from an abusive marriage, and the determination to rebuild following divorce.

Work became my opportunity, identity, and armor.

For whom am I toiling?

Listening to a sermon at The Summit Church on Ecclesiastes 4 caused me to examine my relationship with work more honestly.

The passage describes someone who toils endlessly before asking:

“For whom am I toiling, and why am I depriving myself of enjoyment?”

The sermon was not an argument against work. Work can provide dignity, purpose, security, and the resources needed to serve others.

The warning was against trading relationships for accomplishments.

Three relationships that give work meaning

The sermon offered three relationships that can transform work.

First, our work should reach down. Our abilities, resources, and influence should help lift other people.

Second, our work should reach out. We need friendship, collaboration, and accountability. Ecclesiastes tells us that two are better than one because when one falls, the other can help them up.

Third, our work should reach up to God. For people of faith, God cannot merely be someone we approach when life goes wrong. Faith should shape how we work, lead, and define success.

Giving and receiving help

I have always found it easier to reach down than to reach out.

I recommend people, promote their work, make introductions, and try to open doors. That support is not always reciprocated, but I continue because service is not a transaction.

The harder question is whether I allow myself to be fully known and accept help when I need it.

Being willing to support others is admirable. Insisting on carrying everything alone is not always strength. Sometimes it is fear, habit, or armor.

One handful of quietness

Ecclesiastes offers an alternative to both idleness and relentless activity:

“Better one handful with tranquillity than two handfuls with toil and chasing after the wind.”

We need one handful of purposeful work and one handful of quietness.

Quietness means margin. It creates room to notice people, respond to need, develop relationships, rest, and enjoy what we have built.

Without margin, we can become too busy to serve the people we claim to work for.

Service above self

Service above self is central to how I try to live as a Christian, Rotarian and ICF executive coach.

However, service above self should not mean abandoning ourselves.

We can work hard, become successful and help others. We can build profitable organizations while remaining charitable, generous and humane.

I do not always practice what I preach about creating a measured and fulfilling life. I am working on it.

Perhaps you are too.

Ask yourself:

What is driving the way I work?

Whom does my work help?

Who genuinely knows me?

Who would help me if I fell?

Would I allow them to?

Is God genuinely at the center of my life?

Hard work matters. Success matters. Service matters.

But relationships must matter more than accomplishments.

If this article might help someone, please share it.

I work with lawyers, executives, and business owners in the United States, the United Kingdom, and internationally.

Learn more at www.petergourri.com.

Book a discovery call: https://calendly.com/petergourri-coaching/success

A note on authorship: I used AI to assist with dictating and formulating this article. The experiences, ideas, beliefs, and feelings are entirely my own.